I Need quick and easy targetted traffic! tell me your secrets!

I need someone to wwrite me a quick 10-15 page report on getting quick and easy traffic to my website! The report must be original, and incluse screen shots and examples. More importantly, you must teach me how to do it quickly :) Im interested in most topics in social newtorking. Topics i already know about, hence, not inteersted are: [login to view URL] [login to view URL] [login to view URL] (Or less its none spamming) [login to view URL] (or less its something besides posting ads :) or automated sofrtware) 5. Squidoo I need this info quick, the max i will pay for your infor is $50. befor eyou bid, you must have a technique that you tested and know working, and you also must tell me how much trarffic i can expect from this technique in one day. I will ahve all rights to this document, thanks and take care!